EXCERPT:
COLBERT: “And please don’t buy the false narrative that these are lawless mobs— the vast majority of these protests have been peaceful. You might not know that if you watched cable news, because to the news, peace is boring. That’s why CNN just launched their sister network: The Burning Trash Can Channel. “Breaking news. The fire has now reached the Snickers wrapper. Is it only a matter of time before the empty chicken bucket is engulfed in flame? Anderson?” But you can find footage of peaceful protests all over Twitter.”