EXCERPT:
COLBERT: “Sometimes I bring in another Q-Tip for a menage-a-swab. Keep it fresh. Keep it spicy. Some people online have started to question whether we’re even doing it right. They think we’re jabbing the swab in the wrong place because researchers increasingly believe Omicron may replicate in the throat before the nose. The throat? Die you bastards! What the (bleep) is this? This is tea. There is a rule. What’s the rule, Mark? Booze is booze on this show!”