PANAHI: “Welcome back to The Friday Showdown. Let’s dive into this week’s edition of what in God’s name is Joe Biden trying to say.”
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Biden: “You know that old expression: ‘Time is money.’ As one commuter said, ‘If you’re on the train and they say ‘Portal Bridge,’ you know you better make other plans.”
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PANAHI: “Let’s — let’s go over what he just said there. Let’s just not ignore that, let’s go over it. ‘As one computer said, if you’re on the train and they say Portal Bridge, you know you better make other plans.’ (laughter) I’ve got nothing. Okay. Let’s leave that to one side and see what else the President said this week.”
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Biden: “In fact, we’re taking a page from Terry’s book when he was governor and when he’d be governor next time. We’re emerging from this pandemic, and we want to expand pre-K for three- and four-year-olds — millions of pre-K children.”
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PANAHI: “This man needs a retirement home and a warm ball of soup, not access to the nuclear codes. When he’s not making a fool of himself misreading auto cues, Biden is making utterly incomprehensible decisions that further weaken the U.S. Today we learned that the Biden administration is planning to offer around $450,000 a person in compensation to illegal immigrants separated after crossing the border illegally. The U.S. Department of Justice, Homeland Security and Health and Human Services are considering payments that could amount to around a million dollars a family, though the final number could shift, the people familiar with the matter told The Wall Street Journal. Of course, the Biden administration has completely lost control of the southern border with more than 200,000 illegal immigrants encountered crossing a month. And that’s the ones encountered. So, what’s the President’s response to this catastrophe? Let’s have a listen again.”
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Biden: “You know that old expression: ‘Time is money.’ As one commuter said, ‘If you’re on the train and they say ‘Portal Bridge,’ you know you better make other plans.”
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PANAHI: “(laughter) It’s so good we had to watch it again. I’m sorry, Nick. Try to defend that craziness. The man is in need of a lie down, a pudding, time with his grandchildren. He has no business being in the White House.”