EXCERPT:
JOHNSON (as Trump): “Comparing myself to the son of God once again. You know, many people are even calling me the messiah because of the mess-I-ah made out of the economy. All because of my beautiful tariffs, so beautiful. They were working so well that I had to stop them.
(Laughter)
The prime minister of Canada, big guy, tears in his eyes, he called me and he said, ‘Sir, if you do this, you will upend the global economy, take the stocks and bond markets, and unite your allies against you.’ And I said, ‘Let me cook!’
(Laughter)
And then I burned dinner badly. So we had to stop. But now everything is back exactly how it was... minus a few trillion dollars.
(Laughter)
An historic transfer of wealth from the middle class to my buddies. Oh, well! It’s true, the stock market did a Jesus. It died, then on the third day it was risen.
(Laughter)
Then on the fourth day, it died again. Possibly never to return, just like Jesus.”