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EXCERPT:
KIMMEL: "This feud with Rosie has been going on longer than me and Matt Damon now. (Laughter) I mean, listen, what a great question. This is the kind of energy you bring when your girlfriend keeps beating you at arm wrestling at home. You know, if they’re going to allow stupid questions to be asked at the White House, I would like them to invite me to ask some stupid questions. (Cheering and Applause) 'Mr. President, I'm with ABC. When you’re on the toilet, do you ever look down and cry?'"